Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Discovery Of HIV - Protein Link Called `Significant`

From RainbowNetwork comes a story about a monkey protein - TRIM5-alpha - that resists HIV within the body. Interesting research. It would help so many people if it could be a viable human treatment.

Monday, March 29, 2004

Homeboi's Physical

Now don't get too excited, I discovered an online Physical Attractiveness Survey this morning and decided to give it a go. Well. What can I say. Accurate doesn't even go there. It's almost like my having my mother vetting the blokes I'm gonna shag before I've met them. Spooky or what?

Anyway, a summary of the report:

My Type

Your physical "type" refers to men you find appealing and whom you expect would find you attractive as well. In the test, you picked a relatively large number of men as attractive (OK, so I'm a slag).

The choices you made in the test suggest you have strong, automatic preferences for certain types of men. You made your choices quickly suggesting you have clear physical instincts. A variety of features stood out as important to you. These "turn ons" were noted in different combinations across many of your choices.

Unique Traits

This report highlights your "unique" tastes, or what makes some men personally attractive to you but not to everyone else.

Interestingly, a lot of the features you liked are not especially popular. They're not what usually defines "mainstream" attractiveness for men. But who cares what the mainstream thinks?!

least mainstream

most mainstream

What Is Your Approach to Judging Which Men Are Handsome or Very Attractive?

Unique Tastes In Men: You are open to seeing a variety of men as handsome. Sure, men with "movie star" good looks catch your eye, but you are often equally wowed by more normal "cute" guys. You're not one to judge people based on their looks. In fact, you're genuinely drawn to men that others might dismiss. Maybe it's because you don't buy into society's checklist for "mainstream" attractiveness. Instead, you notice unique features like a strong nose, beautiful eyes, or a cute butt, that make some men special in your eyes. For you, attraction is about the total package.

How You Compare?

Open: You have a more open and accepting view of what makes a man handsome than a lot of other guys your age. In the test, you didn't pick the most "popular" men, but instead seemed to focus on your own personal tastes. This doesn't necessarily mean that looks are less important to you than to other men. You simply have a unique set of criteria and keep your eyes open for special qualities that make a man, who may seem ordinary to most, extraordinary to you.

Black/African Descent

Your choices show a definite interest in Black men of African descent (no shit, Sherlock!!). Their appeal to you depends on a variety of features that you find particularly attractive.

You found 50% of the African American men in this test physically attractive.

You found 15% of the African American men in this test "date-able".

Eyes and Glasses


You seemed especially interested in men with brown eyes (really!). In the test, you may not have even noticed eye color on a conscious level (I didn't). However, those smoldering brown eyes apparently stood out to you on an unconscious level. Supposedly, brown eyes give the impression of softness and mystery [interestingly homeboi has brown eyes].


By your choices, you've shown that for whatever reason you're not attracted to men who wear glasses. You love beautiful eyes, and probably don't want anything to hide them (very true).


A bald or shaved head on the right guy can be a real turn on for you. You seemed to give men without hair special consideration in the test where others dismiss these guys. It's their loss and means less competition for you! You understand the very sexy and masculine quality these men bring. (baldness does nothing for me, but shaved hair, Oh, get me a towel!!)

I like these three chins:

chin 1

chin 2

chin 3

and this smile:

It was even able to identify the age range I go for: nothing too young (about 23 max) and nothing too old (nowt over 35).

Big question: do I know anyone like the report findings.......

Wednesday, March 24, 2004

Oops! Gonna Be Late

Had to hot-foot back home though. Realised at 5.30pm (I'd been in for three hours, like a greedy cunt) that I was supposed to be going to Mart's to find out his test results. Got there about 6.10pm and fortunately he'd only just got back. I excused myself and said I needed to go to the loo - not for a pee, but to put my knickers on (ok, so I'm a cheap slut and a greedy cunt!!)

Mart's test result: Negative. I am so so so pleased. God forbid he ever comes to me in the future and says otherwise. I don't know who'll be more upset.

So what did we do to celebrate? No not vodka (just for a change). Mart made a chilli with 'additional spices' (use you're imagination). Wow!!! It blew my head off.

Been A Naughty Girl, Real Bad So-and-so...

...done too many things a girl shouldn't know!!!!

Hee hee heeeee!

Guess where I went yesterday afternoon. Just for a change I went to McDonalds. Well I worked hard on my projects in the morning, and early afternoon and just thought I'd treat myself. Ok, and I was still a bit horny from last night's shaving episode.

Went through more men than I can remember (or shake a dick at) but only had 3 and a half inside me. Why the half? Well, someone with those gorgeous 'I'm gonna fuck you now' eyes came up to me. He was pretty gorgeous himself, and the cock was amazing, but the problem was that it was very thick and very long. We managed to get half of it in. Saw him fuck someone else though, and it was amazing. He bangs like a bastard. Hope I meet him again sometime...

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Gaydar? Never Been On It!

Gaydar is a funny thing. In some ways it frightens me. There are some nice people out there and also some complete mingers. I mean, I aint no oil painting but I do have something about me - and I don't mean the size of my cock. But in amongst doing the usual morning sickness routine (going for a dump, coughing, throwing up, drinking coffee, throwing up some more) I was trawling gaydar and came across Hulme's answer to Gareth Gates - takeme2paradise. You can tell it's spring: I'm getting horny and the disco bunnies are looking a tad too playful!

Monday, March 22, 2004

Oooh. It Feels So Sexy!!

Thought I'd try out a little of the shaving info I found last night (this morning/whenever). There is a reason behind this. I saw a profile on Gaydar of this lad down in Bristol - bristolgam - and noticed that he was completely shaved. I mean everything!!. It looked so sexy to me that I considered trying it. The result...

Crappy picture - bad cam - but you get the idea. I did the WHOLE LOT. Now I need a good fucking it made me so horny.

The key? Use a hot towel to mosten and relax the skin, hair conditioner before you apply any soap, and long slow lazy strokes.

Does it feel sexy? Too fucking true.

Mart Gets Tested

Well, it happened. Mart and the lovely James have separated. I don't know all the issues - they were on both sides - but sex and HIV were in there, somewhere. As I maintained when I first met James and learned of his status, no matter what happens between him and Mart I'd still be in contact with him. I mean, I only met him just before New Year (not even three months, yet) but I feel like I've known him half my life. He feels the same way about it.

Anyway, Mart has decided that he better have an HIV test. He had the blood drawn on Thursday while I was away on training. He gets the results on Tuesday. I'm pretty sure he's negative. James, despite the way Mart feels at the moment, would never have done anything to hurt him in that way. So I'm going over on Tuesday, no matter what the outcome, to be a mate, to offer support (congratulations/love/whatever), and get pretty stoned at the same time. Now all I need to do is get Kyle on the right track!!

I can't explain the relationship between Mart and me. Probably never will. I mean, today is Mother's Day and he rang me!!! We had to speak a little in code as Arsehole was around, but near the end of the conversation came the line '... but Mother will be there!' I gotta say, I was really touched. God, I hope he comes back negative.

When Viral Infection Meets Depression...

You'll never guess, but, surprise, surprise, my old mate the insomnia is back. Whoop-de-doo!!

So, anyway, I was trawling the net looking for stuff about shaving (the pubic area, which I already do pretty well anyway) and landed on the gay.com website. I'd never spent much time on it before, but, I happened across the following quote:

Depression can be a dark, lonely space. For me, it's like I'm sitting in a tiny square box with no ventilation or light. When it's going full force, it can make me believe the end of the world is near. I have been taught to think of depression as just another feeling on the "feeling wheel," something that passes over time. But even if the feeling passes within minutes, it can seem as if it's lasting forever. I'm told that the three biggest triggers for depression are the loss of a loved one, the loss of a career and the loss of health. I'm batting three for three.
Thom, http://www.gay.com/health/hiv/?sernum=1980

Sounds so familiar and so true. I'd experienced people with depression before in my life. I admit, I didn't really understand it. I still don't understand it, and it's happening to me. Most of the time I can't explain how it makes me feel. The quote really sums it up.

What really depresses me most at the moment...? When Homeboi meets Arsehole!

Tuesday, March 09, 2004

I Hate Myself, So What!?!

Guess what, I'm down with a viral infection. It manifests itself a little like a cold or the flu. Either way I've felt pretty wretched since last Wednesday, and I was really bad with it Thursday and Friday.

If every I'm about to go down with something viral I can usually tell. The skin on the back of my neck, my back and my arms gets sore and very sinsitive to the touch. It's a bit like sunburn, only worse. I described it to arsehole as 'imagine a wire wool scourer dipped in lemon juice being rubbed against your skin'. He kinda got the idea.

We got some Allergy Relief tablets from Boots. They're an antihistamine and they sort of do some good, while they last. I'm constantly dry, have headaches, my nose is blocked and I ache from head to foot. Some fine catch I feel like at the minute!

I've just taken one of the tablets and it kinda depressed me, that I'm gonna end up relying so much on tablets to make me work and to make me feel like I can get through the day.

So, yeah, I'm feeling pretty low and sorry for myself. I don't really wanna go in to work today, but its inspection and I've got a meeting this afternoon to 'present my case'. Frankly, I feel like telling work to just fuck right off. Not that I mean it, I don't think, just seems like a good idea at the moment.

Ok. I'm depressed again. Whatever!!

Think I really need to let off some steam this weekend, try and lighten my mood, maybe get a good shag. Failing all that, a large bottle of vodka and a nice comfy corner might work for me.